Tall Demands.

At 5’3″ and a half (yes, that half is very important), you’d think I’ll be content with my height. But if you spend half as much time as I do with the kids in school you’d empathize. Children these days seem to grow like Jack’s beanstalk. With a bunch of them standing around me I find myself lost in the midst of tall trees dressed in school uniforms. Needless to say, I don’t step out of my room during recess.
In my first week of work I remember I had arranged for a session with an 8th grade class. I still remember exactly how the first few minutes of that session went. I entered the class extremely confident. And as soon as I did, everyone in class stood up to greet me. That is when my confidence shook a bit. Your’s would too if you couldn’t see past the first bench. Quickly I asked them to be seated. In the pretext of keeping my stuff away I turned away and took a deep breath. The session went quite well, thankfully. (I didn’t ask them to stand again.) After that I kinda got used to it; really tall kids crowding me in the hallway or in classrooms.
But then I started to wear wedges that were not just comfortable, they also helped elevate my self-esteem. Of course, its all in my head. But if that helps my confidence, then why not. A few inches of extra height never hurt anyone.
A year and a half into working here and I find that its not just my students that make me feel really small. A lot of people that I have come know and care about, too are really tall. It kinda makes it easier to not be bothered by their height. I mean, sure they are really tall and I’d look small even if I wore pumps. But it doesn’t really matter when you are comfortable with yourself and with them too.
I’m sure none of these people care about my height. Tiny insecurities like these tend to make their way into our oh-so-brilliant minds and have us obsessed with them. But it is alright to feel insecure once in a while. But accepting yourself just the way you are is the first step in others accepting you. Acceptance starts from within.